1.Draft Thesis Statements
2. essay (over 4pages)
thinking like a Mountain (pdf) as below:
http://www.uky.edu/OtherOrgs/AppalFor/Readings/leopold
1/9/2021Draft Thesis Statements 1
https://canvas.pasadena.edu/courses/1111116/assignments/8665472?module_item_id=12653134 1/2
Draft Thesis Statements 1
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(https://secure.flickr.com/photos/118292762@N02/19984447691)
I’d like to give you some feedback on your argumentative thesis statement, so when you have one or
two possible theses, submit them here. Keep in mind that the points will be for submission, not
evaluation.
Process:
Coming up with a thesis statement is not the first step in the writing process.
First, you have to develop your ideas and topics. Before deciding on the claim and rationale, you will
need to develop your driving concepts and major points. Re-read “Thinking Like a Mountain” and
check the discussion again. Review all the materials in this module for ideas that appeal to you.
Consider creating a map or outline of points, then narrowing down the position. Great essays are driven
(or sailed) by one or several key concepts–big ideas.
Advice and review:
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1/9/2021 Draft Thesis Statements 1
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Keep the prompt in front of you–perhaps at the top of the page of your document–at all times. Your
thesis asserts your answer to the prompt. The prompt, and your answer, anchor your entire essay
(ship metaphor, yes) and thus keep the paper from floating off topic.
The argumentative thesis is unlike other essays: it has two elements. 1. How can we think
differently, more critically? And 2. Why should we think this way? In other words, what is the main
reason for thinking more critically in the way you want? The rationale/main reason should reflect the
reasoning process you will use in the body paragraphs to defend your idea.
Avoid merely restating the general language of the prompt. Your answer to the prompt should be
more specific and narrow, and must be original–what you actually wish to argue for as an original
critical thinker. While you are inspired by Leopold’s ecological argument, you should still make your
own case and use your own approach. You can draw from the materials of the course in an
original way.
Avoid summarizing other people’s ideas. Instead, selectively use quotes or facts for back up–
support. The purpose of an argument is to propose YOUR idea, but you can support or back up what
YOU know and think with other people’s ideas. The course materials are there to help with evidence
and support, but they cannot carry your argument.
Your papers are your original creations. Critical thinkers synthesize ideas and facts, challenge
assumptions and the status quo, and take the risk of proposing changes, even radical ones.
1/9/2021 Prompt: Essay 1: Win21 ENGL 001C #11468 INTERMEDIATE COMPOSITION-CRITI-Online
https://canvas.pasadena.edu/courses/1111116/pages/prompt-essay-1?module_item_id=12653132 1/2
Prompt: Essay 1
(https://secure.flickr.com/photos/30256745@N06/15664064173)
Set-Up (premise): Consider the ways in which our ideas and thoughts about ourselves and the world
have impacted its natural systems. Human thought–shaped and conditioned by our societies,
cultures, belief systems, and so on– plays a major role in supporting the actions and behaviors, the
economic systems and industries, that have led up to the global environmental crisis.
Prompt: How can we think “like a mountain”
(critically, ecocentrically) in order to solve
the environmental problems we face in 2020?
Note: This is to be an original argument inspired and supported by the materials we have read so far.
><><><>< Directions: Compose an argument in direct response to the prompt question and set-up. Be sure to select and define your terms, concepts, or ecological principles with care. Leopold's argument was aimed a different time and reader than yours will be. His metaphor and his examples may need updating or translation for your argument. Or, you may find that his ideas are still applicable to our global issues, that the "mountain" is a metaphor for the environment.
Your purpose is to create an argument–that is, to engage a reader (that you must envision) who
does not think like a mountain, or does not understand the importance of thinking critically and
scientifically about the environment, or who may have other priorities.
Convince this reader to think critically, using Leopold as inspiration.
Lead your reader through a reasoning process that is both instructive and persuasive.
https://secure.flickr.com/photos/30256745@N06/15664064173
1/9/2021 Prompt: Essay 1: Win21 ENGL 001C #11468 INTERMEDIATE COMPOSITION-CRITI-Online
https://canvas.pasadena.edu/courses/1111116/pages/prompt-essay-1?module_item_id=12653132 2/2
Defend your position against the readers many challenges and objections. Arguments must
engage counterarguments or objections, and good arguments are designed around those
objections. Arguments are not one-sided declarations but conversations. You are not writing to
the professor; you are engaging your own imagined reader who is resistant or opposed to what
you want them to do for valid reasons of their own.
Use the structure of the academic essay you have learned about in this course. This is essential!
The paper will be evaluated not only on its substance but its structure.
Length: 800-1200 words
Format: Use MLA format for the layout of the essay, as well as citation and documentation. MLA
format (https://style.mla.org/mla-format/?
gclid=EAIaIQobChMIsISqqZaX4wIVFdRkCh0xhQIHEAAYASAAEgJ7Q_D_BwE)
Sources: Use the materials we have read or viewed in this module. Draw examples and evidence
from these sources. If you want to use current data about current environmental issues–which is a
good idea when updating an older point–you should do additional research to gather statistics and
facts (ie, extinction, deforestation, rising temperatures, etc). An essay should always reflect the
course materials but can demonstrate knowledge and credibility with new ideas and current
information.
Checklist:
Argument related, detailed title
Hook
Argumentative Thesis (claim and rationale)
At least 4 body paragraphs with topic and conclusion sentences
Evidence, examples, and reasoning drawn from course materials
Strong final paragraph that draws the big conclusion from the body
Careful editing
MLA formatted Work Cited
Remember, you are arguing FOR positive change. Do not fall into the trap of merely lamenting all of
the problems. Arguments aim to solve problems. Arguments are constructive.
Reread this page many times now and make sure to write the prompt in your notes and on your draft
document. It is vital to answer the prompt question directly.
https://style.mla.org/mla-format/?gclid=EAIaIQobChMIsISqqZaX4wIVFdRkCh0xhQIHEAAYASAAEgJ7Q_D_BwE
1/9/2021 Essay 1–Draft
https://canvas.pasadena.edu/courses/1111116/assignments/8665476?module_item_id=12653136 1/2
此作业将不计入您的最终成绩。
Essay 1–Draft
截止 1月19日 由 23:59 编辑 得分 10 提交 一份上传文件
Draft Essay 1 (1)
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Upload your draft of Essay 1. Peer reviews will be assigned automatically. The will not be assigned
until the deadline passes, however. Use the peer review questions to offer advice and suggestions to
your classmates. You can also make an appointment with a remote tutor at the WSC through the tab on
the menu.
Getting some preliminary feedback is essential to the revision process.
PLEASE ANSWER THESE 7 QUESTIONS IN YOUR PEER REVIEWS:
1. Is there a meaningful title? if not, can you suggest one?
2. Is an argumentative thesis clearly articulated at the end of the introduction? Could the thesis be
clearer or more specific? Does the thesis respond directly and precisely to the prompt? Can you
distinguish claim from rationale? Give suggestions for revision.
3. How do the introductory sentences prepare you for the thesis? Is there anything unnecessary or
unclear in the first paragraph?
4. Does each body paragraph have a single unifying idea? Are the topic sentences clearly supportive of
the thesis? What about the conclusion sentences? Does each paragraph draw a meaningful conclusion
in support of the thesis? Make suggestions.
5. Does the essay provide strong evidence and support for a particular kind of critical thinking or
particular concepts? Assess the effectiveness of the evidence. Make suggestions.
6. Is the essay argumentative? Are objections anticipate and replied to? Make suggestions for
enhancing argumentation.
6. Are there any errors in grammar, punctuation, or sentence structure? If so, mention these.
7. What do you like the most about this essay? Is it persuasive? What did you learn?
1/9/2021 Essay 1–Draft
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总得分: 10 ,满分 10
标准 等级 得分
10 分
Description of criterion
Draft is a complete or nearly complete essay with an introduction, at least four body
paragraphs, and a conclusion paragraph. The document is MLA formatted.
10 得分
Full
Marks
0 得分
No
Marks
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